What to Expect When You are Not Expecting

My adventure of getting pregnant over 35 starting with clomid

Livin La Vida Legging September 9, 2010

Eighteen weeks three days and how many hours…Another good day on the books!  Allergies are still hanging around but I swear the neti pot and my Himalayan Salt Lamps are helping tremendously!  The weather has changed to fall and I couldn’t be more excited!  Fall just might be my favorite time of the year.   The foliage is so beautiful and the weather in Chicago is wonderful which makes for amazing fashion.  I am living la vida leggings lately and loving it!  I got my shipment form bloomies yesterday and found a few successful pieces which I am beyond excited about.  Mainly I ordered a couple of dolman sleeve dresses that are beyond perfect with leggings.  Because I am 5’9 a lot of “dresses” these days tend to be on the short side and work perfectly with a pair of leggings.  The dolman sleeves make a lot of room in the tummy region so accommodating to the bump.   I tried these little numbers on and shoved a throw pillow underneath and am thinking these are going to work for awhile – yay!  Could that be more exciting?

Unfortunately my shopping high came to a swift halt after a lovely conversation with my mother – go figure.   She lives in Ohio and I moved to Chicago almost fifteen years ago and you would think she would be over it….but she’s not!   I seriously cannot get through a conversation without a snide remark from her about how her grandchild won’t know her.  My personal favorite is was when I was asking her about cribs last night she made all these snide remarks about how she doesn’t know what cribs are like in Chicago.  Seriously?  Is there a special manufacturer that only makes cribs for people in Chicago?  I kept telling her we have all the same stores for babies that she does because they are chains and even those that aren’t sell pretty much the same stuff-  she wanted no part of it.  I also mentioned that it might be nice to get a convertible crib with matching furniture that the baby will be able to use for awhile – apparently I couldn’t be more wrong in my thinking and no one in Ohio does it that way.   People buy one crib and then get a bed and other furniture after they are done with the nursery.  I also should be wearing maternity clothes instead of trying to get away without wearing them because that is what people in Ohio do. Is there an opposite of wind beneath my wings? Like I care what my cousins that I never talk to do!  Note to self do not punish the baby for the rest of his/her life if he/she decides to move out of town!

On another note has anyone researched or participated in activities that allegedly help your baby become smarter?   We have been listening to classical music during the commute back to work.   I recognize that a lot of the studies surrounding classical music have come out bunk.  I just figure that it is better than my baby recognizing Howard Stern’s voice!  I did read that DHA is apparently very important during the last trimester as that is when all the brain and retina development happens rapidly.  Check- in my PNV!  Apparently- eating proteins and specifically eggs helps as well.   Gives new meaning to the word egghead does it not?  Luckily I start every weekday morning with an egg or two so got that one covered as well.  I also read that there is a correlation to morning sickness and baby brilliance.  Because morning sickness is caused by the surge in pregnancy hormones the theory is the stronger the surge- the better the development.  So to all the ladies out there worshipping the porcelain gods out there- you might just be taking one for the team and growing that intelligent baby!  Any other suggestions out there on how to mother the next Einstein or Bill Gates?


Guilty Pleasures August 24, 2010

What can I say this has been one of the best weekends I have had in this pregnancy!  I am simply amazed!  I actually got up on Saturday and went in to the office for a bit and then stepped out and did some shopping on Michigan Avenue.  It was amazing!  I got a great walk in and got to visit my favorite stores for a little fall fashion inspiration.  I am excited for my fall pregnancy wear!  I am still waiting for my bump though….why must I still just look like a chunky monkey?   I just look thick and not pregnant and feel compelled to tell all the sales girls that I am 4 months preggers so they don’t think I am hefty hefty hefty!  After running around downtown, I went home and rested for a few hours then…wait for it….I actually went out to dinner with my hubby for a date.   It was fabulous despite the fact that the restaurant I really wanted to go to- Chicago Pizza and Oven Grinder- had an hour and a half wait so we had to go to a second string choice Rose Angelis.  As much as I wanted to I don’t have the luxury of waiting for food anymore.   This used to be just fine with me.  I could sit in the bar and enjoy a cocktail which would tide me over until dinner.  Unfortunately this is no longer an option- an hour difference in my feeding time could be detrimental so we went elsewhere and had a good time and a good al fresco meal.  It was just lovely.   Of course I was exhausted by the time I got home and went straight to bed.   Only to wake up the next morning and have another good day who am I?   I couldn’t even believe it.   I actually got to go to Trader Joes.  Secretly I enjoy grocery shopping when it isn’t crowded- since this is one of my household duties I pretend it is a labor of love for the family- but actually I don’t mind it at all.  I like to buy fun things and normally enjoy cooking.  I was almost giddy to actually be out and about again- I haven’t had a weekend like this in a long time.  As I was checking out the clerk asked me if I was doing anything fun that day and I was like-hello this is fun!  I think she felt bad for me- if she only knew.

I was so inspired that after I got home I actually prepared two meals for the week ahead.    Cleaned the kitchen and even sat outside on my rooftop deck for a bit for a little fun in the sun.  The weather was beautiful and it was glorious.  I did find that all this running around made my back hurt quite a bit- but I have dealt with that before.  I did a few stretches and it seemed to help so onward and upward.  Hubby came home and we had a healthy home cooked meal-finally!   A nice change from the take out we normally have and the Wendy’s I ate for dinner on Friday.  I kind of die for Wendy’s – always have.  It never sounds bad to me and I could pretty much eat it any time which is why it is now my go to meal when all else fails.  I seriously can’t turn it down.  A single with cheese  no mayo and fries- forget about it.  If it were in anyway nutritious I would have it daily.   Thank God there isn’t one in my office building.  Not so healthy I know but what am I to do sometimes- a girl’s got to eat!  Wendy’s is definitely my guilty pleasure- what are yours?


I will survive! July 20, 2010

Is it me or does pregnancy seem like it happens in slow motion?   I mean you find out that you are pregnant your all excited and then you wait.  I am not even three months in and I already feel like this is taking forever.   I want action!  Can I be a Debbie downer for a second and have a little fun with this?  Is there really anything enjoyable about pregnancy?  I have been looking for the positive in this process but other than the amazing miracle of life growing inside, I can’t come up with anything and even that seems to get lost in the day to day minutia.  Anyone?   I am just not seeing it!  Magical time my ass!  There are no perks-   I can’t eat with reckless abandon because I am too concerned about what I am feeding the baby.   I am also worried about gaining too much weight and let’s not even talk about all the items that I am not allowed to eat- like the soft boiled egg I have been craving!  It’s funny but most food doesn’t even sound appetizing except the things I cannot have.  It is a joke to try and plan a weeks worth of meals when what sounds ok one day can make me want to hurl the next.  Last night I made steak fajitas for dinner- they sounded good when I marinated them the day before- and I couldn’t even eat them because I found them revolting -yet in thinking about them right now I could eat one- what is this all about?

Don’t even get me started on the non-stop exhaustion and forgetfulness.   I am so off my game lately- absent minded and out of sorts it’s a wonder I can keep it together at work.  I mean I am a normally a very detail oriented person but I find myself doing the silliest things.  Like for example the time I salted the black olives that I was serving for dinner when I meant to salt the tomatoes.  I also am normally obsessive about checking food labels for freshness and found that I put lemon juice that was expired in my water. Sick.  I almost sliced my hand open when cutting the inside of an avocado- what is up with that I am usually pretty adept with the cutlery. All in a day’s pregnancy work- so not my normal self.  Hubby told me he is about to ban me from the kitchen for fear I will hurt myself – which is huge considering how much he loves my cooking. See no joy here.  Oh wait, I did have a bowl of homemade pop corn the other night with melted butter-  it was amazing but of course I felt bad after eating it because I didn’t think it was a “healthy” snack for the baby and made myself eat something more healthy later which I thoroughly did not enjoy.  Will I ever actually enjoy guilt free meal again?   Are there any PL’s out there that have mastered this?  Please sensei tell me your secrets!

As if missing out on my love of food wasn’t enough there are also the activities…. I would love to go to Lollapalloza but since the street fair was such a disaster for me I can’t imagine enduring the crowd, heat, and smoke again so while all my friends are dancing to Lady Gaga I’ll probably be at home on the couch eating a bowl of popcorn and feeling bad about it.  Talk about caught in a bad romance!  Sucky.   Then you have shopping- a past time that once could bring light into my darkest days.  Now- not so much.   I can’t wear any of the cute clothes, I have to find styles that aren’t fitted and because my boobs are so enormous I need to go a size up in a lot of clothes  and then they don’t fit me right in other places.  I either look like a heifer in clothes that are too tight or a slouch in a potato sack- I can’t win!  Who wants to spend money on that?  I used to love the way I felt in a great outfit and now its kinda meh-  is this killing my inner fashionista softly?  It can’t be!  I love her!  The books say that I am going to start showing soon so I don’t even know what will look good in a few weeks and can’t even anticipate what I will need.  I already splurged on “preggy” handbags this season so I kind of feel like I need to hold off on any of those until fall.  I am trying to get some fashion inspiration but I think I am going to basically just be a black bitch with great accessories and bags, and by black bitch I mean someone that wears primarily black clothing.  A very Goth pregnancy! Or better yet I can channel Heart circa 1975. Its like I am a PL tweener stuck somewhere in between my pregnant self and my old self.  Maybe I need to look for a pregnant style icon. I think I will watch the season of Sex and the City where Carrie was pregnant in real life and see if I can pick up on any tips or I may never achieve pregnant and fabulous?

Now having said all of this I realize how lucky I am to feel like crap 24/7.  There are many woman out there trying to get pregnant that would tell me to get over it- I should know, I was one of them.  I am sure that it could be argued that I have no business complaining and that I should suck up and just enjoy the fact that I am pregnant.   Well I say boo to that.  I am grateful to be pregnant but it doesn’t change the fact that I haven’t had a day in three months without exhaustion or morning sickness.  I know it could be worse and I could be vomiting everyday but I am taking a stand for the pregnant women community- why should we suffer in silence?  We need to vent!  We’re hear we’re sick get used to it! This isn’t the 1950’s anymore we don’t need to suffer in silence- Where is the PL girl power?  I am not a martyr!  This is not fun it plain sucks. There is a reason men don’t get pregnant- I really don’t think they could handle it-but I will endure!  So tonight in solidarity to all the suffering PL’s out there I will bid my misery adieu and am going home to dance around the house while blaring my new pregnancy anthem:   “I will survive”- care to join me?


Good bye belt- Hello Blazer! July 10, 2010

So I have been to wimpy to get the stach waxed yet.   I think tomorrow is the day!  I am getting a massage and facial and figure what the heck why not add it in.    It has been a pretty busy week work wise and since I have been feeling pretty good not a lot of down time.  My morning sickness has been sporadic and limited and not too severe at all.  I am just more tired than I used to be.   I spent some time this week going through my closet.   A few of my wardrobe favorites are sadly no longer on the roster.   My fitted dresses are too tight in the boobs and I feel like my mid section is so bloated it doesn’t look good.  I haven’t really gained much if any weight yet so not sure what this is all about but I can say good bye belts- hello blazers!  Its kind of like growing out your bangs.   I am in this in between stage.  Not yet showing but still bloating!  Once I have the preggers belly I will have no problem with form fitting clothes because it is so obvious that you are preggers but right now I just look like I have a gut and big boobs-  not hot.   Maybe I should just forget about it and go full on white trash and wear some short shorts and let it all hang out!  Not- I am instead camouflaging this by wearing loose fitting clothes and think that blazers are a miracle.   Thank the good lord they are so in style.   Like most working women, I have four different wardrobes that must needed a  preggers overhaul:

  • The work wardrobe.  During the summer I wear a lot of wrap dresses or fitted dresses and heels.   I am not feeling those at all right now so in order to stay professional and feel good about myself I have found that strait or shift dresses with a blazer and a statement necklace are the way to go.   Good bye DVF wrap dresses for now.  I bought a couple of really cute shift dresses one is black with sequins and the other is white but ruffled at the bottom super cute popping out of a blazer!.  These are my two faves because they can go from work to out to dinner and still look great!  Pants also are a non-issue so I can wear those with a loose fitted top and blazer as well.   Always with some great jewelry and a pair of heels.   I never leave home without a pair of cute flip flops stashed in my bag in case I have the opportunity to walk.
  • The at home after work wardrobe.  This consists of leggings or sweat pants and a comfy over sized top.   In the summer a super casual T-shirt Dress is also great on those hot nights.  I love to have cute lounge wear and try not to look like a Hague even when I feel like one.  Sometimes I even grab one of hubbies tops which can look cute like a dress or over some leggings.  Slouchy and soft.  Plus he loves it when I wear his clothes.  I haven’t had to make any adjustments to this wardrobe yet and am thinking I might be able to go through the whole pregnancy with what I have.  Score!
  • The running errands going to a casual bbq wardrobe.  You never know who you might run into so I never leave the house without feeling pulled together.   For me a maxi-dress or shirt dress with some flat sandals is my uniform.  I throw on a stack of bangles and I am out the door.   This is the best part of the preggy wardrobe.  I get to feel stylish and oh so comfortable.   I love the Gypsy05 maxi dresses especially and have been obsessed with Grayce by Molly Sims jewelry.  It can dress up the most boring outfit! Note- ordered a size up in a couple maxis thinking I might want the room and I really didn’t need it.  Another score!
  • Going out wardrobe.  When hubby and I go out on the town or for a dinner with the girls I like to bling it on.  I bought the peach Halston Heritage Dress that Carrie wore in Sex and the City 2 and let me tell you it is fabulous for the pretty bi-otch.  I saw another one pop up on ebay in blue and am thinking I might need it.  It is that comfy and so cute and let me tell you NOTHING shows in that dress! I think it will be great for a September wedding I am going to and if I get the blue one that can go into winter.     I also picked up a couple dressier maxi-dresses and am liking the strapless styles that have some draping in the front.   I just ordered a gorgeous Cut 25 dress from Intermix that I think is going to work fab with some of my new jewels for a cocktail party I have to go to! Love- see you can be pregnant and fabulous!

How long do you think I can make it without going full on maternity?  I think if I stick to lose fitting style I can go a long way without entering the dreaded maternity store- I don’t know why but I have a maternity store aversion.   They just seem awful to me for some reason and I know they have come a long way and have some really cute styles but I digress.  I have a girlfriend who never bought any maternity clothes-has anyone else?


Diane Von Bustenberg June 24, 2010

Filed under: Pregnancy — Sage Sloan @ 2:24 pm
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Fashion and the pregnant lady…oh the dilemmas.   I full well understand the fact that in a few months I will be showing and have already ordered a bevy of maxi dresses and pregnant appropriate wear.  What I didn’t expect was to start having issues this early on.  Since June is literally busting out all over my work dresses are starting to become a problem.   Today I have a meeting and it is 90 degrees outside.  I usually opt for a stylish wrap dress and some peep toe heels and today was no different except that I needed not one but three safety pins to keep the damn thing closed!  Last year this dress fit perfectly- dare I admit I am wearing something from last season???  Last year DVF and fabulous- this year Diane Von Bustenberg.  My bulging chest makes me feel like a sexy librarian porn star- except that I am not naked underneath and about to perform dirty acts on anyone around me.  I am heading out to a client meeting soon so I am hoping this will work to my advantage.

I have been wearing the sea bands pretty religiously and they are my favorite feel good/not look good accessory.  I am not wearing them today due to short sleeved wrap dress and have had a couple waves of not feeling so good.   I think I am going to whip those bad boys on as soon as I get home so I don’t feel worse later.  My appetite is nil.  Nothing sounds good to me at all.  I am so over all of my lunch options downtown. I need some new options.  I can’t think of one thing I would like to eat during the day.  I had an amazing salad for lunch with my girlfriend yesterday but even ordering that was a challenge.  The Cesar salad was made with raw egss and most of the salads had some sort of feta or blue cheese which could be an issue.  Luckily I found an amazing salad the Gigi- at the Palm- if only I could have that every day!  Shrimp, avocados, beans, tomatoes- delish!   Also love the name Gigi! The lunch was so much fun-she was so excited an supportive-  love her! She suggested that I take a folic acid supplement like she did during her pregnancies because of the spinal wonders it does for the bebe and I say it can’ t hurt.  How much is enough?   Since the body eliminates any extra why not add a little more into the mix?  Folates are also common in asparagus and spincach which I normally enjoy but don’t necessarily have every day.  Nothing else to exciting to report here…looking forward to Monday’s doctor appointment where I can get all my questions answered….let’s hear it for tanning lotion!