What to Expect When You are Not Expecting

My adventure of getting pregnant over 35 starting with clomid

Belly Buster September 7, 2010

Labor Day is over and back to the grind. How was your weekend? Any fun BBQs or Labor? My weekend was not without its drama- something new. Saturday I noticed we had a message on our home phone. We both use our cells and office phones mainly so we don’t get a lot of calls at home. Low and behold- it was from my Dr’s office. WTF?? I was freaking out. I don’t have another appt for another two weeks so it definitely wasn’t a reminder. It was a message from the lab that said we have a “non-emergency” message for you so please call us back. Uhhh…I hadn’t been to the Dr in two weeks- what could they possibly be calling about? I don’t have any billing issues with them. I am not going to lie if I was a neurotic person I would have lost it over a long weekend. They left the message at 5 to 5 on Friday. Who does that? My mom and mother in law went ballistic. Surprisingly I took it in stride and hubby was a miffed. I figured that they lost something or who knows what and if it was something to be at all concerned with my actual doctor would have been the one calling and not saying non-emergency. But still- isn’t everything your doctor has to say urgent when you are preggers? Doesn’t all lab work mean something that you don’t want to wait three days to find out! I called first thing this morning and found out that it was to tell me our genetic screening came back normal. Hello- I was told if they didn’t call me in three days it was normal so this was not news. Thank god nothing was wrong! I might add I felt pretty good about not getting all worked up over this though- kudos to me I really am a grown up- maybe I actually am ready for this!

As if that wasn’t excitement enough- the weekend ended with a bang- Mark your calendars, it is official I can no longer button my pants and thus this will be the last day of 2010 that I wear my regular pants. Am I now officially preggo? I still think I look more fat than pregnant but people keep telling me I have a glow. I feel like the glow is more attributed to my new skin care products than anything but who knows-I’ll take the compliment! Thank you very much! Ugghh on the pants though. To get by today, I did the rubber band trick but don’t think this is really working for me- kind of un comfy. Did die laughing when I told hubby I needed one this morning and he brought me a large one thinking I would put the whole band around my waste to hold up the pants. Still laughing out loud when I think of that. Of course I immediately did my online research. My research concludes….I have no interest in investing in any maternity pants. I rarely wear them in the fall and winter and since I own my own business and am the only woman that works here, I am thinking that I might need to institute a “pregnancy” dress code that includes jeans. So maybe I buy a pair or two of cute maternity jeans and work them in with leggings dresses blazers etc. I did break down today and ordered a couple of maternity tank tops- mine are all so short so I need them longer to layer. I bought a ton of stuff on sale at bloomies this weekend- all non-maternity that I think are going to work AND be super cute. I will keep you posted upon arrival. Can I just share that I got these really cute faux leather leggings- OMG to die! I am excited to see how things fit – I suspect that whatever I get now will only last me a couple of months until I am huge and then I will reassess and purchase again. Good times. I also am wondering about this Bella Band- any recommendations? Has anyone tried one? Do they work? Since it was a long weekend and I had a day of misery (allergies) I had a chance to catch up on my reading. Am I the only person astounded by what they read pregnancy books? There is so much information contrary to what I have experienced that I am incredulous. Yes I know I have obsessed about genetic testing but I really need to set the record straight. All of the books I have say that if you are over 35 it is recommended to get an amnio. WHAT???? This is just not true. Girls if you are over 35 and thinking about genetic testing please read this. There are steps in the process and you can rule out genetic issues without and invasive amnio or CVS sampling but you have to start early in your pregnancy. We were offered genetic testing which involved a blood test and an ultrasound. Then four weeks later we took another blood test. We were told that if both came back normal than you were 97% likely to have a healthy baby. Why on earth would I do an amnio or CVS now? A simple set of blood tests and a fun ultrasound were all I needed. If we had different results I don’t know what we would do next amnio or not but my point is you can get a lot of information without any risk to the baby. Ok off my soap box on this…now on to some of the funnier things I read:

Cheeseburger Crotch? What the hell is that? I have had nothing even remotely close to this. Is this normal or do these ladies need to learn a thing or two about personal hygiene?

Constipation- This also hasn’t been an issue for me- I eat fruits and veggies daily so maybe this helps.

Don’t use Coconut Oil- There are so many health benefits associated with coconuts that I can’t even believe I read this too crazy to comment on.

You will have more energy in your second trimester??? For me- not so much. All I want to do is rest and sleep. Even though my lovely bladder usually keeps me form sleeping in. I feel tired all of the time. Does anyone know how many hours per night are recommended? Can’t seem to find THAT info anywhere.

A few things I have experienced that none of the books have mentioned:

The Caboose gets stuck – Am I alone or have you noticed that when doing a number two that the train just does not want to fully leave the station? I mean seriously if I don’t want to sit on the pot for thirty minutes I might need to start using baby wipes.

Speaking of pots….I spent the weekend with my Netti Pot- Do believe the hype- what I like to call my nose douche is working wonders on clearing my pregnancy sinuses! I have used it in the morning and am already noticing a difference. Love it!

Are these all crazy but true?


Let’s talk about Sex Baby August 26, 2010

We had our sixteen week appointment yesterday and as usual  we asked a lot of questions.   The allergies I am experiencing are of course normal and I can take Claritin or Sudafed if want to.  Since I am going for pregnancy au natural I will do none of the above.   Other suggestions were to get an air filter in the rooms I spend the most time in.  I am sure that my Bernese Mountain Dog isn’t helping too much either with all his hair!  Time to take out the furminator.  We also did another round of genetic screening and this is the last one.   It was a blood test no big deal.  I  learned that my doctor will not do a scheduled c-section which I was kind of interested in so that is off the table.  Their rationale is that during a c-section because there is an incision there is a risk of damaging the uterus which could ultimately affect your chances of another pregnancy.  I did not know that.  I guess I will just have to get my back into pushing uhhh….we’ll save that for another entry- so not looking forward to that.  Add this to another one of my many issues!

We also got to hear the heartbeat again.  This time it was a lot stronger than before.   Because I have been a psycho about taking all these online gender tests I had to find out what our bpm were and it was around 160 bpm- nice!  I don’t know about you but we are anxious to find out the sex of our baby.  I feel like then I will truly be pregnant and can begin to plan names, rooms, outfits etc.  Our doctor told me that none of the old wives tales are legitimate and that the most accurate way to find out is at the twenty week ultrasound.  She said that we could do an ultrasound sooner and at our own expense- but that they are hard to read and often inaccurate for that reason.  She said that the 3D ultrasounds are better in the last trimester because you can see so much more detail and that she wouldn’t recommend one until much later if we wanted to go that route.  Apparently the intelligender test is highly in accurate and all the other wives tales are just plain that tales….  Personally I don’t really care if we have a boy or girl- I would be excited about either- I am sure it will matter much more on our second.  My hubby really wants a boy so for that reason alone I am hoping it is a boy.   Also we have this extremely annoying sig ot in our family that keeps insisting it is a girl and I would like to prove him wrong.  I mean he seriously acts like he knows for sure it is a girl and is very uppty about it-  so annoying.  I highly doubt he has some sort of special psychic power to know this information and he knows hubby wants a boy- so shut up already.  Additionally all the online tests I take say it is a girl too so it will be interesting to see how this pans out.

Are you familiar with the whole hamburger turtle analogy?   Apparently that is how you tell the sex on an ultrasound.  Pretty funny.  The girl’s lady parts look like a hamburger and the boy’s manilihood looks like a turtle.  Who knew I was once a hamburger? Will the turtle come out of its shell?  From what I understand on ultrasounds done earlier than 18 weeks they are hard to read – I mean the parts are so tiny now so as time goes on and the baby grows it is easier to tell.   Isn’t funny how obsessed we get with looking at a baby’s privates?


Playing the odds- this isn’t Vegas baby! August 2, 2010

When will it ever end?   I have not been a very good blogger these past few weeks but I must say that I am getting my ass kicked by a peach!  As you might have guessed the baby is the size of a peach now and where as I had a string of good days yesterday was another one spent on the bathroom floor.  I thought this was supposed to be ending soon.  I guess not.  I know you are all dying to know what I have been up to since I have been so delinquent in my writing the past few weeks.  My business has been extremely busy and I have been having out of town guests the last few weeks.  My sister in law was in town for a conference so we got to have dinner dates throughout the week.  Beyond enjoyable!  She is so good to talk to and down to earth and we went to some of my favorite restaurants in the city.  Also did some shopping which was fun for her….me not so much.  Still haven’t figured out dressing for pregnancy yet but definitely did not enjoy trying on clothes that I couldn’t get over my gi-normous boobs.  I think it is def time for a new bra.  It was great to talk to her because she has two amazing little girls and has been through this.   She is also realistic about what pregnancy is really like and it was great to ask her questions about what she went through.  The day she left we had some friends over to round out a delightful weekend.  They were so cute and excited and it was great to talk to them as well.  She is a PA and had some interesting perspective regarding c-section over natural birth.   I will definitely be exploring this as we go along so more to come on what she told me are the benies of c!  I was feeling ok most of the week but it hit me like a ton of bricks after everyone left and then I was down for the count Sunday night.

We had some very exciting doctor’s appointments last week.   We had our 12 week check up at the doctor.   It’s funny but I search and search online and can never find information on what to expect during our doctor’s visits.   So for those of you wondering I will give it to you strait up….what happens during the 12 week appointment?   Not much.  The usual….pee in a cup and then meet with the doctor to review any tests/questions, kind of not so interesting. We went over most of our questions in the last appointment so nothing too exciting there.  The doctor did use the Doppler machine to play the baby’s heartbeat for us but I am a visual person and really didn’t get as much out of that as I do in an ultrasound.  It doesn’t really sound like a normal heartbeat like you would expect- sounds more like wings flapping.   What we did discuss during the appointment was genetic testing.   I need to step on my soap box here for a minute…  I can’t believe how the odds change for Down syndrome once you hit 35.  So many people kept telling us oh- it’s no big deal to have kids when you are older and you aren’t really at any more risk.  This is not true- the odds change significantly every year after you turn thirty five.   Had I known this – there are definitely things I would have done differently- primarily with getting a new doctor much sooner after my miscarriage and not taking his advice on waiting it out.   I didn’t have the time!  It upsets me dearly how poorly he managed our case and his lackadaisical approach had us waiting almost a year to get pregnant again.  It doesn’t sound like a big deal but it is if you look at the numbers it is.  At age 36  the chances are roughly 1-329 and at age 37 they are 1-259 when you get to 40 it is roughly 1-150 so time is of the essence here.  Something to think about.

So let’s talk about genetic screening.   If you are over 35 you are automatically offered it.   We decided to take it because we both felt that it would be great to know that everything was ok.  Let me just tell you it is a downer and awesome all at the same time.  The downer part is all the facts and discussion surrounding what could go wrong- does anyone really enjoy that?  No.  Also we have a friend that was given a false positive and went through a lot only to deliver a healthy baby.   Knowing this is possible is kind of nerve wracking.  Now for the awesome part- you get to have an ultrasound at 12 weeks and it is amazing!   We could see our baby’s face, arms, and legs etc.   The baby was moving around and we could watch it all.  It was pretty unbelievable.   We also could see the heartbeat and in the still pictures you can actually see the nose eyes and almost all the facial features.  Granted they are a little alien like at this point but pretty remarkable none the less.  It looks like the baby is holding a microphone to sing- so cute!  I can’t even imagine what it is going to be like at 20 weeks but feel so lucky that we got to have a sneak preview.

So for the nitty gritty on what they do in genetic testing.  The first step is an ultrasound where they measure the baby’s spinal fluid.  Don’t freak out if the ultrasound tech won’t tell you anything during – ours wouldn’t – but take the time to enjoy the rest of the ultrasound it is magnificent.   Then you give some blood-  shocker it’s not like you aren’t a human pin cushion already- then they call you in to the little room to meet with a counselor.  The good news is you get the spinal results right away; ours were great which was a huge relief because the spinal portion counts for 70% of your screening results.  Phew- everything isn’t roses yet but we are definitely skewing in the right direction.  Then they basically just review with you how to read the test results that you will receive in the mail and tell you that if there is a concern they will call you.  If we have a concern our call will come today.  Given our 70% status I am sure we will be a- ok!

So I am starting my second trimester this week and allegedly will start feeling better.  As if I can believe that.   I had a great week last week and thought I was finally seeing the light.  Only to get my ass kicked yesterday after a fun weekend with my parents.  I still feel like crap today and can’t believe how bad I was yesterday.  It is a new kind of bad where I feel like I am going to pass out all the time and am nauseous.   My doctor gave me the Zofram and since I have been so anti drugs I am so hesitant to take it but if this continues I won’t have a choice.   It is bad and I think yesterday was one of the worse days I have had. None of my old tricks were helping, water, food – nothing.  Little Baby why you got to be so mean to me?  I am praying the pregnancy gods- please please make it go away!  Bring it on big belly- just take away the sickness already!


Crown to rump June 21, 2010

Anticlimactic seems like my life’s descriptive lately.  It pretty much covers the weekend in every way- not that that’s a bad thing.  I was so tired this weekend that I decided to skip the girl’s party.  Nights are so ill for me that I just didn’t think it made any sense.  Also I would have needed to lose the sea bands and that is like a death wish at night.  Note- I couldn’t find any suitable sea band disguisers.  A cuff or large bangle can easily cover one- but who wears one on each wrist without looking like Wonder Woman? I will still be on the lookout but haven’t found any solution just yet.  The highlight of my weekend was not getting highlights…which I desperately needed but sunning topless on my roof top deck.  There really isn’t anyone who can see me and it is something that I tried on my honeymoon in Monaco that was rather nice.   No tan lines and the feel of sun on your skin is wonderful.  No burns this time just a few minutes of partial nudity and then the show was over.   Kind of a guilty pleasure if you will.  It was a great weekend over all, lot of QT with the hubby, healthy eating, my doggies, and relaxing but nothing too exciting.

The seven week sonogram was today.   I guess per usual I had some high expectations here.  How to describe this experience….anticlimactic.   The whole process took literally 15 minutes.  I was not told to have a full bladder and the technician used the intra – vag device to conduct the sonogram. It was literally in and out- slam bam thank you mam.  We could see the heartbeat which was pretty cool but the rest was a little too speedy.  The heart rate is 126 and our CRL was 1.1.  CRL means crown to rump length which god love my hubby he starts making rump jokes in the midst of it and I was laughing my rump off!  She did tell me that she saw some fibroids which I found very concerning but she told us that they are very common.  I will not feel good about these until we talk to the doctor about it and plan on making a call tomorrow to follow up and see if she read the ultrasound and what this fibroid business is.  I have a feeling we are going to become quite well known at this doctor’s office and I hope they have a good sense of humor.   As we were walking to the checkout my hubby walking with ultrasound picture in hand was yelling out “crown to rump” down the hallway.  “crown to rump” -Pretty funny stuff.

Of course I already googled this information as soon as I got back to the office and am feeling a little better.  Apparently seeing the heart beat is a big deal-  this lowers the chances of miscarriage to less than 15% according to my findings.  So loving that piece of info.  Fibroids seem pretty common and in most cases don’t cause any complications but in the ones that do there can be some issues.  I am going to reserve worry on this until I have had a chance to discuss with the actual doctor….hard as it may be.  Is it wrong that I am a little disappointed there is only one?  I thought fo shizzle we were having twins and only one bebe showed up.  With my horrendous illness I thought twins would be an excellent way of avoiding this again in the future because we definitely want more than one and would be a great start to a family.  Is it wrong that I am even still wondering if my fibroid was covering the other bebe?  Ok- Time to get over it-  I am very excited about the heartbeat and that so far so good on healthy size and for now the fibroids can bite me.


Red Rover June 18, 2010

Filed under: Pregnancy — Sage Sloan @ 11:11 am
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Red Rover send me right over!  In my attempts to lose my pale rider status yesterday I came out the other side lobsterfied.  I even put on sun block and still am burnt!  Not to mention I have tan lines where my sea bands were.  I truly do not understand this.   I took them off the whole time I thought I was in direct sunlight and yet I still have a hand farmer’s tan.  WTF.  Sun burn and nausea what could be better?   Even the Aloe I applied isn’t working!  Thank God I am working from home today because I would feel like a total moron in public.   Luckily I used a different sunblock on my face and that went unscathed but my bootylicous body is another thing.   There go my plans to work outside again today.  I thought for sure it would be gone this morning but I swear it is worse than last night!  Just call me Pinky Tuscadero!

The sea bands are actually working.  Despite their unattractive nature they seem to do the trick.  I had them on most of the day yesterday and must admit I felt pretty good.  They don’t hurt that much anymore but I did take them off to go to bed.  Do you think I should get a bedazzler and bling them out?  They would really look more like a bracelet that way.  Why would they not make these to look more like bracelets?  I mean layered bracelets are so in right now-  I could totally pull these off if they looked anything like a bracelet.   Clearly the creators of this product have no fashion sense.  I searched for other color options and let me know tell you the options are there are no options.  The ones that are supposed to be “fashionable” look like something strait out of the Hello Kitty collection.   Perfect for a girl in junior high but not at all appropriate for anyone with an ounce of sophistication.  I like a little whimsy don’t get me wrong but really there isn’t an outfit in the world that can pull these off! It is supposed to be in the 90s all weekend and if I want to leave the house I am going to have to go sans sea band.  I am going to run out this afternoon and see if I can’t find something stretchy to cover them up with!

Might I take a moment to mention that we are days away from the ultrasound?   I can’t wait to get this show on the road!  It seems like this pregnancy is taking forever and not being able to really share it with anyone isn’t helping.  I might add that my frenemy has still not contacted me and I know she is certainly up to it since I noticed she had updates on Facebook today. Confirmation of what I was already thinking.  It has been almost two weeks since I shared this with her and not a peep.    Chime in at any time here…is this rude or do I have unusually high expectations?  I really hope that I can manage to attend the girls party after dinner on Saturday-  I could really use some time with my friends!


The never ending hangover June 11, 2010

Today we are at  week 5 day 4.  According to my What to Expect Iphone app our babies are the size of sweet peas.   Notice I say babies?  I am totally convinced we are having twins. We like the term sweet pea and I think that is going to stick around for awhile.  Last week we were the size of an orange seed.  Do you think Gwyneth Paltrow read hers was the size of an Apple seed at this time and the name just stuck?  Things are going well, but I tell you this nausea is not a very good time.  It is almost non-stop- luckily I haven’t started hurling and hopefully wont but this feeling is bad enough.  I feel like I have a 24 hour hangover without the massive headache.   I am completely exhausted and there are only a few minutes in the day when I actually feel totally normal.  Standing is not my friend and nothing seems to take away the nausea.  I am eating small meals throughout the day and it is still there.   I am so happy to have these symptoms because it means I am pregnant but I do feel pretty miserable overall.  I read that weird hairs may start sprouting, I haven’t noticed that yet and my skin has been normal and clear.   I also read somewhere that your hair can change texture and I am secretly hoping that I lose some of my curls.  They are a little too kinky and if they soften up a bit it would be amazing!

I have been invited to a small dinner party at my girlfriends next week and I think I am going to decline going.  I would love to spend some time with the girls but none of them know that I am pregnant.  I would totally be up for it but am worried about the alcohol thing.   We always drink wine at girl’s dinners and if I turned it down would be the equivalent of taking out a megaphone and telling everyone I am expecting.  I have never turned down a glass of wine at one of these events and if I did it would be a dead giveaway- my girls are smart!   Hubby and I decided to keep this between us until after the 7 week ultrasound.  Once we get a good result- and picture we are going to tell people then.  I looked online for excuses to tell people why you are not drinking and couldn’t find anything that would be believable.  The standard “I am on antibiotics” seems the most common but really have you ever heard of anyone not being able to have at least one glass of wine on antibiotics?  I just don’t think I could pull it off.   I considered taking my alcohol free wine but what if someone reads the label?   I will be asked and outed and I am just not ready to go there yet. What is a girl to do?  I wish I could take a nap and sleep on it.  It is mid afternoon and I am exhausted!  My only decent hours of the day are from 9-2 then it is downhill from there!  I am trying to write during theses hours because when I come home from work I feel like a spent Phil Donahue and my blogs would bore you to tears!  Since I am basically in hiding for the next couple of weeks I probably still will bore you to tears.  I mean right now someone in the office put on some coconut smelling lotion in the next room and I smell it as if I was wearing it…. hating it…while listening to the crowd outside me office cheering for the Blackhawks Stanley Cup Victory- happy for them but ready to throw a Chelsea dagger!