What to Expect When You are Not Expecting

My adventure of getting pregnant over 35 starting with clomid

Playing the odds- this isn’t Vegas baby! August 2, 2010

When will it ever end?   I have not been a very good blogger these past few weeks but I must say that I am getting my ass kicked by a peach!  As you might have guessed the baby is the size of a peach now and where as I had a string of good days yesterday was another one spent on the bathroom floor.  I thought this was supposed to be ending soon.  I guess not.  I know you are all dying to know what I have been up to since I have been so delinquent in my writing the past few weeks.  My business has been extremely busy and I have been having out of town guests the last few weeks.  My sister in law was in town for a conference so we got to have dinner dates throughout the week.  Beyond enjoyable!  She is so good to talk to and down to earth and we went to some of my favorite restaurants in the city.  Also did some shopping which was fun for her….me not so much.  Still haven’t figured out dressing for pregnancy yet but definitely did not enjoy trying on clothes that I couldn’t get over my gi-normous boobs.  I think it is def time for a new bra.  It was great to talk to her because she has two amazing little girls and has been through this.   She is also realistic about what pregnancy is really like and it was great to ask her questions about what she went through.  The day she left we had some friends over to round out a delightful weekend.  They were so cute and excited and it was great to talk to them as well.  She is a PA and had some interesting perspective regarding c-section over natural birth.   I will definitely be exploring this as we go along so more to come on what she told me are the benies of c!  I was feeling ok most of the week but it hit me like a ton of bricks after everyone left and then I was down for the count Sunday night.

We had some very exciting doctor’s appointments last week.   We had our 12 week check up at the doctor.   It’s funny but I search and search online and can never find information on what to expect during our doctor’s visits.   So for those of you wondering I will give it to you strait up….what happens during the 12 week appointment?   Not much.  The usual….pee in a cup and then meet with the doctor to review any tests/questions, kind of not so interesting. We went over most of our questions in the last appointment so nothing too exciting there.  The doctor did use the Doppler machine to play the baby’s heartbeat for us but I am a visual person and really didn’t get as much out of that as I do in an ultrasound.  It doesn’t really sound like a normal heartbeat like you would expect- sounds more like wings flapping.   What we did discuss during the appointment was genetic testing.   I need to step on my soap box here for a minute…  I can’t believe how the odds change for Down syndrome once you hit 35.  So many people kept telling us oh- it’s no big deal to have kids when you are older and you aren’t really at any more risk.  This is not true- the odds change significantly every year after you turn thirty five.   Had I known this – there are definitely things I would have done differently- primarily with getting a new doctor much sooner after my miscarriage and not taking his advice on waiting it out.   I didn’t have the time!  It upsets me dearly how poorly he managed our case and his lackadaisical approach had us waiting almost a year to get pregnant again.  It doesn’t sound like a big deal but it is if you look at the numbers it is.  At age 36  the chances are roughly 1-329 and at age 37 they are 1-259 when you get to 40 it is roughly 1-150 so time is of the essence here.  Something to think about.

So let’s talk about genetic screening.   If you are over 35 you are automatically offered it.   We decided to take it because we both felt that it would be great to know that everything was ok.  Let me just tell you it is a downer and awesome all at the same time.  The downer part is all the facts and discussion surrounding what could go wrong- does anyone really enjoy that?  No.  Also we have a friend that was given a false positive and went through a lot only to deliver a healthy baby.   Knowing this is possible is kind of nerve wracking.  Now for the awesome part- you get to have an ultrasound at 12 weeks and it is amazing!   We could see our baby’s face, arms, and legs etc.   The baby was moving around and we could watch it all.  It was pretty unbelievable.   We also could see the heartbeat and in the still pictures you can actually see the nose eyes and almost all the facial features.  Granted they are a little alien like at this point but pretty remarkable none the less.  It looks like the baby is holding a microphone to sing- so cute!  I can’t even imagine what it is going to be like at 20 weeks but feel so lucky that we got to have a sneak preview.

So for the nitty gritty on what they do in genetic testing.  The first step is an ultrasound where they measure the baby’s spinal fluid.  Don’t freak out if the ultrasound tech won’t tell you anything during – ours wouldn’t – but take the time to enjoy the rest of the ultrasound it is magnificent.   Then you give some blood-  shocker it’s not like you aren’t a human pin cushion already- then they call you in to the little room to meet with a counselor.  The good news is you get the spinal results right away; ours were great which was a huge relief because the spinal portion counts for 70% of your screening results.  Phew- everything isn’t roses yet but we are definitely skewing in the right direction.  Then they basically just review with you how to read the test results that you will receive in the mail and tell you that if there is a concern they will call you.  If we have a concern our call will come today.  Given our 70% status I am sure we will be a- ok!

So I am starting my second trimester this week and allegedly will start feeling better.  As if I can believe that.   I had a great week last week and thought I was finally seeing the light.  Only to get my ass kicked yesterday after a fun weekend with my parents.  I still feel like crap today and can’t believe how bad I was yesterday.  It is a new kind of bad where I feel like I am going to pass out all the time and am nauseous.   My doctor gave me the Zofram and since I have been so anti drugs I am so hesitant to take it but if this continues I won’t have a choice.   It is bad and I think yesterday was one of the worse days I have had. None of my old tricks were helping, water, food – nothing.  Little Baby why you got to be so mean to me?  I am praying the pregnancy gods- please please make it go away!  Bring it on big belly- just take away the sickness already!

 

4 Responses to “Playing the odds- this isn’t Vegas baby!”

  1. Interesting article. Were did you got all the information from…

  2. So glad everything is working out for you! I’m 26 and not bothering with the genetic testing. There’s no family history for us and our son is fine. Besides, even if there were something wrong, it’s not like it would change anything (unless of course it was a defect incompatible with life, but that’s another story). I also had an ultrasound at 12 weeks (it’s standard practice to have one at your first appt at my hospital) and all parts were present and accounted for. The only thing was this baby is a cm bigger than my son was at the same gestational age so they moved my due date up a week. So I’m expecting another huge baby! Oh, and C-sections are great, I had one and I’ll be having another one. I’m not made to deliver vaginally (my pelvis is too narrow) so a VBAC isn’t an option for me. I took maybe 2 weeks to recover back to normal, but I took it easy till my 6 week checkup, just to be safe. But the best part about a C-section is everything is still intact down there! My son would’ve tore me a new one if I would’ve had him vaginally, it would’ve been bad. He was almost 10 lbs so thank God for C-sections!


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